Today I’m going to talk about something vitally important and close to my heart… biscuits! The following is a constructive analysis of my 5 favourite biscuits, weighing out their pros and cons.

Isn’t it obvious that I’m putting off doing something more important?

Number 5 – Custard Creams

These are plain biscuits with a layer of cream in the middle which isn’t too sickly sweet. I like the pretty pattern they have on the outside too. They are perfect when dunked in tea because they don’t immediately go soggy.

Number 4 – Bourbons

Similar construction to custard creams, but with chocolate biscuit and filling. These are also lovely dunked in tea. They do go a bit mank if left open though!

Number 3 – Oreos

I used to find it almost impossible to get these anywhere in the UK, now they seem to sell them all over the place. These are dark chocolate biscuits with a custard-cream-like filling. In the US, they make loads of different flavoured ones, and even ones with double the filling! They’re quite expensive though, so nice as a treat!

Number 2 – The Pink Wafer Biscuit

Incredibly addictive. The biscuit consists of layers of pink wafer, sandwiched between layers of vanilla. The problem is they are very very moreish and I often find myself feeling ill after demolishing an entire packet because they’re so sweet.. Dipping them in tea can result in a lot of soggy pink stuff at the bottom of the mug.

Number 1 – Chocolate Caramel Digestives

These are immense! They take the chocolate digestive template, but have an inner layer of caramel, which really complements the chocolate and the biscuit components.

…that was way too many big words!

Every friend I have introduced these to has become completely obsessed with them. Sometimes we’ll have conversations like this:

“do you want to come round for a cup of tea?”

“..mmm… naahh, I’ve got some really important..”

“I’ve got caramel digestives…”


Because of the properties of the caramel, the biscuit does not tend to crumble as much as others, but the chocolate is very melty and sticky (especially when dunked). Mmmmmmmmm……